“For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men” (Romans 1:18).

Reading: Romans 1:18-32

Let’s suppose we are praying for the conversion of someone we love—a relative, a husband, a child, or a friend—someone who has also caused us much suffering. What is our role in their conversion?

The Role of Wrath Against Sin?

This person has hurt us deeply. Are we justified in feeling intense anger toward them for everything they have done to us? No. Only God’s wrath is just (Rom. 1:18). He is the only righteous Judge. He knows all things and can judge impartially. We are not perfect, nor are we better than the person who has offended us, and we are not in a position to judge them: “For the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:20). The only one who can feel righteous anger toward sin is God (the Father), and ultimately, the offense is against Him.

The Role of Suffering for Their Sin and Bearing Their Guilt?

We easily suffer for another’s sin as if it were our own. We feel guilty. But no matter how much we cry, we cannot pay for someone else’s guilt. All our suffering over their sin does not contribute to their salvation. The only one who can pay for sin with His tears and suffering is Jesus. He wept over their lost condition, bore God’s just punishment for their sin through His sufferings, and carried their guilt.

The Role of Convincing Them of Sin?

This person has offended us. Should we continue to accuse them for years of offenses? No. We must forgive them. Should we tell them how much we have forgiven them, reviewing every offense we have pardoned? If not, how will they know the cost of our forgiveness? No! That would only offend them. It is not our job to convict anyone of sin. That is the work of the Holy Spirit.

Here we see God’s complete work! The Father feels wrath, the Son bears the Father’s wrath for sin and takes all the guilt, and the Holy Spirit convicts them of sin, showing them they are deserving of God’s wrath and just condemnation for their sin. He then points them to Christ, who bore their guilt and died for them so they could be forgiven. What a beautiful collaboration between the Persons of the Trinity!

If our role is not to be angry at their sin, suffer for it, bear their guilt, or convince them of sin (and yet we often try to do all these things!), then what is our role? It is to forgive them with humility, as one who has already been forgiven of far greater offenses, to preach the gospel to them, to point them to Christ, and to intercede for them in prayer. We must step aside so as not to hinder the complete work of God. Our role is to walk in love, pray, and watch as God works.